Enduring the Cold

What a lesson there is in that title.

The cold settles in and stays for a while when it comes. It lasts for it's season.

There are many good things about the cold. It certainly makes you appreciate the warm. It gives you excuses to cuddle with your children, your hubby and your doggies. I love that my doggies sleep with me. Foot warmers they definitely are. I've been thanking God today for the little things. Like gloves, and blankets, our home and gas logs. He is so good to me.

My precious daddy came by this morning for a visit and some warm coffee. He's so full of love. Our relationship with him has grown over the years, the appreciation for one another, time revealing that we stick together. He loves my dear husband Tony. I'm thankful that he is a loving, positive father figure for my husband - who lost his own father in 1994. He was not close to his own father and it means a lot to me that he has formed a bond with my own.

The bad things about the cold. The depression it brings in, the cold that seeps through to my bones, the attacks of the enemy from so many different people.  Well I guess that last one happens year round but this winter it seems as though he has definitely worked overtime. My husband has never had any real family other than his mother, his uncle Kenny and his aunt Bonnie. The devil seems determined to destroy his relationship with his mother and he is using his sister to do it. Tony and his sister have never been close. She's always been many things that aren't good. I'm not going to air it all out here as that wouldn't be fair. She has just gotten out of jail last August. We were both hoping for our families to be able to spend what's left of our lives together. Taking the time to get to know each other better, help each other out. She claims to have changed, she says she is different but all I see is the same mean, hateful, trouble starter she always was. Not caring about her own mother, keeping her so upset and starting so much stressful drama. I've been married to Tony for 20 years and it's always been this way. Somehow this time, I thought it would be different. The saddest thing is that his mother is believing his sister. All of her lies. If you've ever been blamed for something that you honestly didn't do then you can certainly understand how it feels. It's a horrible feeling.

The best thing is that the Lord is dealing with our hearts and our anger. We've made the decision to move forward and leave all the ugly behind. During this time the Lord has shown me how full of love and close my own family is. He has revealed all the truth to my family, my three girls and my husband. Now that we can all stand together it makes it better. It helps us to be stronger. It doesn't ease the pain of my husband's heart to have his relationship with his own mother destroyed but it helps him to move on.

I think that is what 2014 is going to be about.

Moving on. Moving on together. My next posts coming are going to bring more of our life. Less of those trouble and pictures of what we get to experience every day. Our children. Our grandchildren. Precious moments. Full of love. Focusing on the positive and letting go of the negative. Looking forward to where we are headed and not looking back to where we have been.

We will continue to pray for the truth to be revealed but we will not dwell on that we cannot change. Tony won't fight it. He never has. He'll sit back and allow his sister to do whatever it is she will do. In the end, I know, that the Lord will prevail. He will take care of it all.

It's going to be a good year.

We will endure the cold while it lasts and bask in the warmth of the sunshine that is to come!

Merry Christmas 2013!

I love how God changes things in moments. SO many answered prayers. I get down sometimes but I know that my Father allows that only to show me His greatness and His power. I'm nothing and have nothing without Him. He is just and He is faithful.

This year has been hard to get into the Christmas Spirit. The things I wanted couldn't be bought. Because of all of my anger I've felt as though I couldn't pray. I know what the Lord expects of me. I know His word, but I have been so in the flesh and so angry at people and how heartless they can be. I know to pray for them but all I've wanted to do is seek revenge.

I sit at home today for that reason. I knew that if I were to be around one person and I were to be provoked that I would give in to that anger. I am glad I stayed home. I have a wonderful mother in law but my sister in law and her family have always rose against my dear husband and my family. It breaks my heart for my husband. It breaks my heart that he has always been mistreated, treated less than his sister, and never good enough for any of them. No matter how well he proves himself, still, he is attacked. It's hard as his wife to watch him experience this and not retaliate. He on the other hand is so good at it. Who knew he could be such a meek and humble man. He is so honorable. I love him so much.

I mentioned my brother and the custody battle for his son in my last post. I'm happy to report that he was able to pick his son up today on Christmas day and will return him to his mother on Sunday before he returns to work! The Lord knew that in the midst of all the battles swarming around me and my own family that my very one wish this Christmas was for my brother to be able to see his son.

The Christmas Spirit has overwhelmed me. I couldn't be happier. THIS truly is the BEST Christmas that I have ever experienced. I am still battling some anger, so prayers are appreciated, but the one thing I know is that God is in control. He alone is my provider. And He takes very good care of this family. I have no worries.

I pray that each of you have a very very Merry Christmas!

Thank You Lord for sending your Son Jesus to die on that old rugged cross and raise again three days later to save my unworthy soul.

Merry Christmas!

Thankfulness

We've made it through two girls with the flu, one with the strep, two Thanksgivings, lots of visits, wisdom teeth removable coming this week, new job-at the same place- a promotion to office manager with lots of new things to learn. My brain is over crammed with things.  Yet, I have so much to be thankful for. I've wanted to blog but it seems like I can't find the time. I head to bed very early in order to handle my days that start so much earlier than I'm used to.

I miss my camera. I lost my phone. I used it as a camera to share so much. That hurts a lot on my blogging and major life event sharing. I'm hoping to figure out a way around this soon.

I wish I had all night to poor my heart out but tonight is just not that night.

Soon though. Soon.

RIP Daniel Shane Rogers 8/28/13

I have no words to express the pain of losing a loved one. So much goes through your mind. The last time you saw them. The last thing you said. The hug you got. I love you Shane. I know that your heart will never hurt again. You are safe in the arms of our Savior. I'll never forget you.

Shane died tragically today in a logging accident. He was a Senior at PCHS. I was so proud of him. He was an honest, kind hearted young man. Full time student and full time worker. A young man of honor.

I Love to Laugh

Proverbs 17:22

A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: a broken spirit drieth the bones.

 

I praise my God that joy fills my soul and laughter spills forth from my spirit. Nothing picks you up like good hard laughter. My family brings me so much. They are my everything. They complete me. 

 

Absence in May

Sorry I've haven't had a chance to update here during this beautiful month of May.

I'm keeping my precious grandson Monday-Thursday each week and have been keeping a good friend's two little ones here and there as well. That, along with class reunions, the Honduras Coffee Shop on some Friday nights, taking small dates with my sweet husband-riding out onto beautiful land with gorgeous rivers, visiting my dear mother in law and her hubby, cooking dinners and pies. (I've been on a pie kick. Did I tell you that? I don't think I did. Homemade chocolate pies, strawberry pies, oh yummy!).

I try hard to share my adventures here on my blog for various reasons. Mainly as a dairy, so that one day my family, my children, and grandchildren can come back here and read my life in my words. It's a wonderful way to journal memories, thoughts, events, and pictures. The beautiful weather of the month and the many events taking place have detoured me.

I've just been wrapped up in life. It feels good. I cannot explain the welcome feeling I have toward the spring and the summer coming. I immensely enjoy the outdoors. We are talking about trying to get a camping trip together. I love camping next to the rivers in our area. I live in such a beautiful place. I need to spend more time taking pictures and sharing them with you.

Yesterday, I went to the Doctor with my oldest daughter Heaven. She is 16 weeks pregnant. She has been very sick-which reminds me so much of me with my own pregnancies. She has lost weight and not gained. She is beginning to have a few good days here and there, so I'm hoping as she progresses further into her 2nd trimester she will continue to feel better. The next appointment in June we will learn of her babies gender! She has a girls name all picked out but a boys name is nowhere in the future. lol She isn't sharing names just yet, because the last time she shared a girls name that she had chosen it was taken by a close friend. This time, she is savoring it until the last moment.

Savannah has gotten her a car, a 2003 Volkswagen Beetle Convertible and is working for a friend of mine. She is still hunting another job to fill in the gaps but I'm very proud of her.

Meadow is ready for the summer. Only two more weeks maybe of school?

My husband and I have spent this last year falling in love all over again. July 4th will be our 20th year Anniversary. We have had some great years and just a couple of really down ones. The Lord has held us together tightly and He enables our hearts to be forgiving and understanding. He has given us patience with one another and time, and time has been the best friend to us of everything. Time is a bond in itself. The love we share now is different than the love we shared in the beginning. It's only something that someone who has experienced can understand because words just can't describe the meaning. I'm most thankful for my husband, my very best friend. I love him so much. I have so respect for him. He is such an honorable man. He makes me a better woman. Marriage, it is a wonderful thing. I'm blessed beyond measure that ours has lasted and is still going strong.

I guess in this post what I'm sharing is that I have learned to love life again. For a while there I was so caught up in becoming a nurse that I left all else and forgot how to enjoy life. My happiness depending on passing or failing. For now, I'm taking a break. It's just the 18th of May so the next month may hold a different foretelling. School will either go back June 17th or the middle of September. Me, well I'm going with the flow. I'll decide when the time comes.

For now, I'm going to get in the shower and get ready to go on the mountain. I'm keeping my grandson tonight, picking up my mother-in-law and going to hear my husband sing in his blue grass gospel group and spend some time with the Lord.

(And a note to my sweet friend Debra, thank-you from the bottom of my heart for your comments. They warm my soul and put a smile on my face. Your friendship is precious to me. I apologize for being away so long and missing your encouraging words. Please know that I cherish them. Hugs to you.)

Floating Along

Feeling a little better but things are still the same as they were in Days go By. Not much change in my situation but I'm feeling better so that is the most important thing.

I have hope. I have things in the makings and we will see how things go. It's just good to feel lighter. Making decisions is so hard for me. In the midst I feel as though I was weighted down by the whole world. My biggest fear is making the wrong decision. Afraid that my decision will cause me or my family great regret.

If you are a reader of my blog you know by now that making decisions isn't my forte. It the hardest part, next to not having control over things. lol Both of those are hard for me.

Right now I'm taking a breather.

I will soon be here:

Enjoying the sound of the ocean waves, the smell of the salty air, the feel of the wind blowing through my hair, the taste of salt on my lips, my feet in the sand, hand and hand with my husband. Nothing can top that. Bring on the beach!

I have appointments as soon as I return that will reveal the next steps of my future.

Time will tell.

"At the beach, life is different. Time doesn’t move hour to hour but mood to moment. We live by the currents, plan by the tides, and follow the sun." -Anonymous

Snowy Beauty

Isaiah 1:18 Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.

Last night we got a little surprise. They were calling for ice but we got snow. I think a little ice came in before the snow hit but the snow is so billowing and beautiful.

Tony was off work, I am out of school, Savannah Sky is home, and school was canceled for Meadow.

Family Day.

I love them.

Few and far between.

Meadow has been a little under the weather for over a week now. Cold with sore throat and continuous cough. She has a doctors appointment in an hour. Tony and I are going to upgrade our cell phones. I think it's time for the Droid! I'm oober excited.

Meadow has been asked to go on a mini vacation with one of her good friends from school. They are going snow tubing, spending the night in a hotel, eating out and possibly going tubing again the next day. I am so thankful for opportunities like this. I know she is going to have a blast. She leaves in the morning.

Tony and I have decided that we are going to the beach for a few days over spring break. I cannot wait. We are planning to take his mom as well. The beach is her favorite place and she has not been in 13 years. I talked to her yesterday about it and she was so excited.

God is good. We are so blessed to be able to enjoy the life we live together. Family, so tightly knit together.

Guess I need to get ready to head out, and prepare for studying this evening and weekend. Unless we head back out to Honduras Coffee Shop tonight. Another musician is playing and I LOVE the folk music and the company.

Oh, I almost forgot. I am going to share a couple of pictures of our snow. It's not a lot but it is definitely enough. I enjoy the serenity of it.

 

 

Our trees in our back yard. 

 

 

Meadow's foot prints on our back porch off of our kitchen.

Love is so Sweet

With all of the stress of my life each day it's wonderful to have a day that goes so well. I've made it through 3 of my 4 days of school this week. Definitely not an easy week but it's almost over. This evening I come home and have the most wonderful fellowship with my family. Time spent with Meadow until she went to church and then Tony and I really enjoyed each other's company. Sadly it had been a while since we were able to sit and talk and just laugh and goof off.

It was nice. More than nice...I just don't have words.

In RN nursing school you honestly don't have a life outside of studying. It really makes you appreciate those sweet moments in between.

I've also been working on building my blog up. After going back and reading past posts, it really made me appreciate my accounts of our life. I think I'm doing pretty good with everything I have going on.

I have another quiz in the morning and another test next week. So... short and sweet. it's been a good week.

And an especially good night.....

Happy 45th Birthday Tony

I love you so much!

We spent the day as a family all snuggled in our den. Our heat pump is out and the temps inside dropped below 50 degrees. We moved our mattresses in the den, lit the fireplace and turned on the electric heater to keep warm. Those are the best memories.

Early Celebration

We gathered as much of our families as we could, some close friends, and headed to the Outback Steakhouse as a mini early celebration of my precious husband's birthday. We all had the best time. Steak, lobster, blooming onion, coconut shrimp, baked sweet potatoes....ect.... Lots of laughs, numerous trips to the bathroom (with Treyty man), a little arguing with Meadow, and sharing bites of food all around the table- made for a wonderful time. I forgot my camera but thankfully sweet Heaven had hers so a few pictures will come later (soon!). :)

I have had a few days off for some R & R and yesterday was my rest day. I slept almost all day! Today was my relaxation, enjoying good food, friends and family. Tomorrow will be another slow day of both while Monday will be a full study day. Back to the grind as they say.

I will be in one day surgery on Tuesday. I'm nervous and excited.

Right now though, I'm heading to beddy by. I'm exhausted and full. Ha!

UPDATE WITH PICTURES

Me, Hubby and my grandson

My mom, daughter Sky and good friend Tracy

Daddy and Me-I sure love my daddy

Treyton and a little friend he made at Outback.

Sweet hubby and his mom.

Me and hubby again.

Matt my son in love, grandson Treyton and daughter Heaven

Love this picture!

Happy 45th Tony, I sure do love you!

Good times, good times.............

Jumbled Brain

Too much information smashed into one little head already. And today was only Medi Tech training for the COWs (computers on wheels) at the hospital I will be training in. It's scary and exciting at the same time. I love going to the book store and picking up new supplies for this semester. Thankfully all my books were purchased last semester so my needs list was very short. I picked up several study guides and I read them all tonight. I'm so thankful for these. They will slip right into my binders and make for great little reminders when you know something but it's just not coming to you.

Studying is what I'm doing. I'm continuing to plunge through my 30 sum page chapter in Fundamentals on medication administration, practicing drug dosage math and prereading my Pharmacology. It's going to be one doozie of a semester.

Last semester I worked in the nursing home, I'm so looking forward to working in the hospital. Lots of exciting things coming.

Heaven and I are going to the Farmer's Market in the morning. I haven't been in a long while and I'm looking forward to seeing what goodies they have.

Sky and her friend Becca cleaned out my classroom today so I'm going to put some time into painting and "redressing" the room into my study for nursing school. Lots of goodies coming for it. I also plan to distress a China Hutch that belonged to my long lost Nannie West this spring. I'm going to incorporate some earthy toned colors with accents of aqua and different hues of blue. Blue is my favorite color. Sapphire is my birthstone. I'm going to make Meadow a little nook (corner) for her sewing machine, supplies and new goodies she got for Christmas. It feels good to have this little project under way. I'm so happy with my home. I've got my bedroom exactly like I wanted it, my kitchen is done, and the den is done. So now on to my new study.

I use to want to move to badly. I always felt as though this house belonged to my mother in law. It took years for it to feel like home. We've been planted here since 1997. That is a long time to live in one place. I remember our years of renting and house hopping and it makes me even more grateful for our home. I love it here. The peaceful homey feeling. It's not perfect but it's our perfectness in it's own way.

I've built up a lovely collection of gorgeous red dishes. Some Paula Deen some not. My kitchen has one wall that I paint every so often when I bore of the colors. I started off with a Biltmore Estate shade of purple. It lasted about a year and I was ready for a change. I went with the bricky looking Paula Deen red and I love it so much all we have to do is touch it up. I have had no desire to change it since we've had it done. It's a cool shade. I have a curtain with a coffee house theme and it has the same bricky red and a touch of aqua in it. I'm really excited to bleed that aqua over into my study. It's going to be a great blend.

I have to say my favorite thing in our home is our fireplace. For years it was covered up by a board. I never understood why. Then one day inspiration hit me and I pulled that board down and cleaned and cleaned that fireplace. We carpeted that room and painted it a coffee creamer color and then added gas logs to the fireplace. Stunning it is. There is an old hand built fireplace mantel that adds just the right personality.

Meadow wants to go to Kmart when she gets home tomorrow to pick up some clothes. She wants colored jeans. I can't believe those things are back in! It's so 80's! I have to laugh. I remember those days. Even now I just don't care for colored jeans.

I sure love me some cow girl boots though! These are the ones Tony got me for Christmas......

I love them. They are Corrals and they are so comfortable. I've tried on everything from Ariats, Tony Lamas, and Old Gringos. Let me tell you, nothing compares to these. The soft feel of leather and notice the square toe. They are amazing. Only a few styles come with the square toe. I plan on ordering another pair in February that have some aqua in them. I haven't decided if I'm going to do all aqua or just accented aqua. I love them all. :) I highly doubt the aqua ones I've been looking at are square toed though. I'll have to go with pointed toes on those.

Well, I think I've rambled long enough. I've talked on just about any and everything just jumping around on no particular theme-oh yes- that's right- Jumbled Brain! That's okay though, my life is just like that, I love it that way. Never boring.

New Years Eve 2012.....almost 2013

Tony rented movies for the night. We are together but doing different things. I'm semi watching slash semi studying. I have med tech class this Thursday. So, I'm digging into medication administration and drug dosages math. Fun! Fun!

I say that but I mean it. Studying is hard but well worth it in the end. I'm truly living my dreams. They are coming true.

Today as I walked through the house I had such a sense of thankfulness. Thankfulness for my husband, for being a wife. It truly is a role that I enjoy. Thankful for my girls and being a mother, another role that brings me great joy. Thankfulness for our home, it brings us such safety and security. All of it together represents my lifetime dreams. Dreams that have come true.

2012 has been a good year for us. A time for growing closer. All of us. I feel that every relationship and every member of our family can say that this year we've considered each other more and that we've grown tighter, closer, and even more loyal to one another.

It's the year that all of my preparing and hard work began to pay off with my acceptance into the ADN program at DCC. It's the year I passed my dreaded first semester. I was so afraid of failing.

It's the year of great beginnings.

I pray that our feet stay on the path the Lord prepareth for us. I pray that He keep His loving, safe, secure hands around us. I know that He will get us through another year. Another great year. Together.

Bring on 2013!

Breakfast Bar Sundays

We set the clock and got up early this morning. My daddy, Heaven, Matt and Trey all met us here at our house around 8:30. We all went to Mt. Airy to Golden Corral for the breakfast bar. Breakfast is Tony's favorite food. He'd been wanting to go for a long long time. It was good. I'm more of a fancy restaurant girl. I prefer Carabas, Outback, Long Horn or little country places like Dixie Pig. I'm not much on buffets but I had a wonderful time and thoroughly enjoyed my morning with my family.

It's the fellowship that makes the experience. I'm so blessed to have to the love and support from such a tight knit family. The spirit of love that dwells amoung us is beautiful. It's soothing to the soul. Refreshing to the bones. It lifts you up.

My Jesus is love.

He is my Savior.

He is my courage and my strength.

Do you know Him?

He's my very best friend.

My confidant.

He guides my foot steps and leads me along the path He created for me.

He's faithful.

In honor of Him we decided to ride out to one of my favorite places on earth (I have several). We rode out to Kibbler Valley. We rolled down the windows (in spite of Heaven's complaints of the cold) and we listened.

What a beautiful sound the river makes as it runs. The air was so fresh and crisp. It made me feel alive and rejuvenated.

We took a few pictures.

It had changed some since my last visit. New cabins, remodels, gazebos, decks, new fishing holes, camping spots. One day Tony and I plan to have a small piece of land there. Even if just to place a camper there right next to the river. I can't wait.

Down in that deep valley, in the deep crevice of those mountains, it's beautiful. It makes it hard to relate the comparison you always hear about being on the mountain top or being in a valley. The mountain top is suppose the greatest moment while the valley is suppose to be the lowest. For me, their beauty is the same. The presence of Christ is so real you can feel Him just as strongly in either place. Maybe that is the point, He never leaves us.

I love the Mountains.

I love the Valley just as much.

These scriptures are so beautiful.......

Deuteronomy 8:7  For the LORD thy God bringeth thee into a good land, a land of brooks of water, of fountains and depths that spring out of valleys and hills;

Isaiah 41:18  I will open rivers in high places, and fountains in the midst of the valleys: I will make the wilderness a pool of water, and the dry land springs of water.

Seek Him, for He is seeking you. 

Here is a glimpse of the homes in the valley and some of the river, but these do not do the river justice. I'll take better ones soon.

I love how the parents set this slide up right next to the steps. What a neat idea.

 The water is so beautiful and my pictures-these pictures-do not do Kibbler Valley any justice.

 A privately owned picnic area.

 A beautiful cabin. I love this design.

 An older cabin.

 This is a neat little camp site. It's for sale. It's small but it's right next to the river. Tony and I have seriously discussed this as a future venture for us. We plan on getting a nice camper when I graduate from RN school and a place like this would be perfect for set up.

 The water again.

 Another private owned sweet spot.

 again.

 beautiful

 Cute cabin

 Neat rock, it hangs way over. The picture doesn't bring it to life at all. It's breathtaking in person.

 This is me standing under the rock and looking up to take the picture.

 It was cold, see the Icicles?

 Now this is a nice place.

 You see the mountains behind it. This place is beautiful.

 This is an older home being remodeled.

 This place is across the river. Very hard to get pictures of, but this is my dream place. I love this home. It has been remodeled but kept so original. I love the 'Little House on the Prairie' feel to this.

 Another Shot

 Again.

 This is beautiful but way to fancy for my taste.

 Another private owned site

 Again, another private owned site. I love the old cement table and seats.

 One of many bridges.

I hope to go back to Kibbler Valley soon. The next time will be planned and I will be sure to take my good camera, my Nikon D7000 and my zoom lense. These pictures were taken with my small point and shoot Olympus that I keep in my purse. It's a nice little camera but it doesn't capture the detail my Nikon does.

So, that's a wrap to my breakfast bar Sunday.

It's time for me to go and start studying, I see lots of medication administration in my future.......

Sleepy Saturdays

This semester my escape has been Dawson's Creek. We've never had cable television and never watched a lot of T.V. We do however have Netflix. So, I decided to find a old show that was complete that I could watch alone and on my time. The one draw back that I found with this was that I would often escape to Dawson's Creek when I could have been studying more. I knew that I really needed to finish the seasons before school went back next week.

 I stayed up until 4 a.m. finishing it last night. The last three episodes of their last season, season 6, were so good. I cried for over an hour while watching. It was so bittersweet because once I'd finished the show there was like a piece of me was gone. I was happy with the ending though. Very satisfied.

I slept in today and Tony being such a sweet man came to wake me around 12. My sleeping schedule over the holidays reminds me of my homeschooling schedule. I always revert back to my night owl lifestyle when left to my own free will. It has its pros and cons. Tony fixed me chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast. Savannah had her friends spend the night last night. Her boyfriend came over today and we all watched movies together. I fell asleep in the floor, under my heating blanket, and just woke up. It's 7 pm. Talk about a wonderful nap. I slept hard.

Lazy, sleepy Saturdays.

I love them.

Laid back, nothing to do, surrounded by family and friends.

Hmmmm and now I'm hungry.

Starving in fact.

I think I need to send the kiddos out for more take out.

:)

Thank-God for Sleepy Saturdays.

Mimi's Little Man

I sure do love this little guy......

and he sure was happy with his no sew Mickey Mouse blanket his Mimi made him and his Mickey Mouse sippy cups his Mimi bought him.

Happy 17th Birthday My Sweet V

My middle girl Savannah Sky. My 'V' is growing up. 

 She is so beautiful.

I love you my V. 

Christmas 2012 Family Photos

Just a few.....

The Bowman and Dalton family. 

Meadow, Matt, Heaven, Jenileigh, Roxy, Tony, Treyton, Sky

My man Tony and I on the couch. 

 Pappy, Treyton and Mimi.

The joy of my soul. My grandson.