February 12, 2012

Emotions Can Be Very Hard to Overcome

Today I have peace. Thank-you, each one of you that have prayed for me. The anger that consumed me hurt so bad. It's so hard to deal with that kind of pain. It returns because forgiveness isn't a one time thing. It's not a once and for all.

It's a continuous choice that you have to make day after day. The longer you do forgive the easier it gets to move on and forgive again.

It's when something similar happens to you once again, that it knocks your feet out from under you and you hit the ground - with so much more force than you did before. It knocks the air out of your lungs. It opens old wounds that have been sewn together, but not yet healed. It takes time to deal with all the emotions that arise from deep within you. You scream, you run, you try to hide, but there is no escaping it.

The only answer is to stop and face it again, and pray with all your might, allowing God to remind you of His great love and His great power, and how He has forgiven you. That you are no better or any different. He forgives, and so must you, seventy times seventy.

So now I ask for you to pray for Tony and I specifically. We need guidance. Do we return to where we were or do we move on? Where would the Lord have us to go? What does the Lord want us to do? Pray that we be still and hear the voice of God.

God is so faithful.

And I am so human.

I want to be more like Him and less like me.

I love You Jesus. I love YOU! Forgive me for being angry with You. For casting blame where there was none. Forgive me for my excuses and selfishness. Forgive me for not being a good friend, a good leader, a good example to those You set before me. Help me each day to recognize that sin in myself that I may repent and by Your word, Your power and Your might, I conquer that sin and transform, renew in the likeness of You. The Holy and Perfect One!

I am an OVERCOMER through Christ my Savior!

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