March 25, 2012

Self-Control

Such a great week and then boom. I suppose it was a test? I had an epic fail. I get so upset with myself when I lose my temper and let my tongue lash out. It burdens my heart so bad that all I can do now is cry. Of course my conviction is so strong I don't leave things on a sour note and I immediately pray, repent and then apologize to my precious friend. Sometimes lack of sleep and a huge stress load overloads your emotions and you lose control of your flesh. I'm still maturing. I'm not there yet.

I cried out to my Father, why do I do this? Why can I not recognize it BEFORE it happens instead of realizing it after it's too late.

I praise Him for His forgiveness. He told me, He said, "Jennifer, you are human. You will stumble, you may fall, but the important thing here is that you caught it immediately. Not days later or weeks later. You may not see the improvement, but it's there. You are growing. I forgive you. Do not be so hard on yourself. I've already forgotten it. I love you my daughter. Stop expecting perfection of yourself. Allow me to work in you. I will strengthen you."

He gave me the scripture that Paul shared about his own flesh.
Romans 7:15 "For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate." English Standard Version
How true this is. Tomorrow is a new day. I will not repeat the same mistake again. Now, I'm going to snuggle in His arms and rest in His peace and awaken refreshed and new tomorrow. Selah

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